I've Been On Both Sides Of The Fence.

   

This article has been laying in my heart for quite some time now. It is dedicated to every once found but now lost or "almost lost" soul out there. It's for those who once upon a time had no shame to identified as burning fiery Christians but who'd today rather distant themselves from the whole church shenanigans. I don't know what got you to where you are now but as long as you say today, as long as you're not dead, God is not done with you. I've been there, I've done that, I've been on both sides of the fence. As early as fourteen years of age, I decided to consecrate my life to God (as for my true born again date, only The Lord has the perfect of record of it).  I hung out with a group of zealous fellow, bible-preaching/studying/praying classmates. The impact in our school was epic. From that group, just a handful has remained faithful and few have gone through and lost themselves in life altering experience to again find themselves in the Lord. I was (still am) a happy gal, ready to help when and how I could. Until one day, a christian sister and friend took advantage of it, spit on our over a decade friendship and literally stab me on my back. This situation left me hanging on the edges of hell for years, with unforgiveness forged in my heart. I had two options:
  1. I could continue in my bitterness by cursing every christian that would dare smile at me or get closer to me because of that offensive offense (if that's a phrase!) from the christian sister, libeling every act of kindness as hypocrisy and more. I could continue towards my own rebellion towards God : at one point I had stopped going to church, reading the word and praying with the excuse that I had no business hanging with back-stabbers.
  2. Or I could hang in there ask, My Father in heaven to help my unforgiving heart. I could try to figure out a way not to let this situation change me at the core and make me forsake my pursuit of righteousness.

I bet you have gone through something similar if not worse. A church member has trashed talked about you, or your pastor has greeted everybody around you but you, or you lent some money to a brother/sister and they failed to pay you back. You experienced such a bad treatment at the hands of a brother/sister that it made it you doubt the veracity of salvation.
Regardless of what has driven you  to your current spiritual state, you're facing two options:
1. Continue in your current state and eventually staying, living and dying away from God or
2. Turn around and grab back that which you have left behind: your fierce and vibrant faith in the Lord.
It's not too late, you haven't gone too far.

One thing I found out during my life crisis was that there is no single commandment or statute of God that we can observe by our own strength, they all require Him to strengthen us. Therefore, our job is just to let our desires be known and our cry heard by Him. Although the new year has already started (I'm not much of a fan of new year resolutions anyway), squeeze into your list this new goal: re-kindle your relationship with your Creator.

A simple prayer from an honest heart will suffice: "Heavenly Father, I'm not sure how I got where I am today. But I feel so lost and desperate. I would like to come back to you. I've done so many dishonoring things and made so many wrong decisions. Help me, please! I know I don't deserve you listening to me but I truly need your help. I pray in Jesus' name, Amen!

It's totally worth it, I guarantee it!

Tresorly Yours